Who are you? If you ask a dozen people that question you will get a dozen different answers. The answer will often reveal how a person defines themselves.
- I am a doctor, lawyer or life coach. They define themselves by their career.
- I am married or single. They’re defined by marital status.
- I am a high school drop out or addict. Their failures define them.
The way we see ourselves is the life we live out. You can’t escape it.
As a Certified Life Coach, I can’t tell you the number of people who have allowed their educational status to be their means of self-worth. Oftentimes, I will run across high school or college dropouts that feel like their career goals have come to an end because of their educational issues. Understanding that your education doesn’t define you as a person is fundamental in helping them gain the confidence necessary to craft a winning career. In many occasions, people who allow failure to define them will find themselves stuck, unhappy and even depressed.
Your career is what you do, not who you are as a person.
Your marital status is just that, a status that can change at any given time.
Your failures are experiences not meant to define your future or kill your dreams.
Who were you meant to be BEFORE life happen to you? Before the divorce, termination, bankruptcy, molestation, abusive relationship and trauma, you had a destiny assigned to your life. I am here to tell you that IT IS STILL THERE!!
The Way Out:
Say this to yourself: Where I’m at right now is not who I am!
The way out of the spiral of mistaken identity is to anchor your identity in a Rock that is unchanging and secure. When you get to the place where you are validated by the blood of Jesus Christ and His blood alone, you begin to see yourself differently. You are then defined by the unconditional love of Jesus. When Jesus defines your life you will see yourself through the lens of love, not rejection, self-hate or criticism. When your identity is anchored in this Rock then you move with confidence, knowing there is no failure in Jesus.
As His child, you are blessed in your coming and your going. The apple of His eye and the object of His affection. You are a King’s kid, sons, and daughters of royalty. A diamond of great worth. A pearl beyond value. When you are defined by what He did for you, then you are no longer defined by what you did or didn’t do in life. You are who Jesus says you are and you can do what Jesus says you can do. This doesn’t manifest based on head knowledge, it only manifest when you believe it in your heart.
This is fundamental to pulling yourself out of the rut of insecurity, self-doubt, and self-sabotage. People will often say to me, “That is easier said than done.” Guess what? They are absolutely right!
You need to do more than just read a book and listen to a motivational video. You need help, accountability, and focused ACTION.
Your identity is under attack in a hundred different ways a thousand times a day. Some of the identity attacks are in your face and others are subliminal. In your face attacks are easy to identify. It is the co-worker constantly challenging you to prove that you are as good as your boss thinks. Maybe, it is the teacher that said you will not be able to write a novel, speak in front of people or amount to anything. The consistent “ifs” to your identity can be draining.
The subliminal attacks on your identity come through social media, TV, radio, and magazines. Let me ask you, have you ever seen a man with a beer belly on the cover of GQ magazine? On the last episode of Bachelor, please tell me if you saw any women above a size 18? They are subtle attacks that say, you have to be this or that to get what you want out of life. These attacks are below the surface. We don’t really notice that they are having an impact on how we see ourselves until we start to question what we see in the mirror. Sometimes we avoid the mirror altogether.
This is why it is easier said than done because the attacks are constant.
The enemy of your soul is like a cyber-thief constantly looking for a weak spot in the wall of your security and value.
How many of you are trying to prove yourself to others? How many of you are killing yourselves to try and measure up to some invisible bar? It is time out for all of that. A winning mindset is a confident (not cocky) mindset. A mindset that stands on the foundation of unconditional love and an identity anchored in Christ. Knowing who you are means you have nothing to prove. JUST BE!
JUST BE your amazing self. That unique personality that shines brightly in a room full of people conforming to the norm. YOU DON’T HAVE TO CONFORM! You are not meant to conform.
Your identity is a WINNER ordained by Jesus to be a CHAMPION!!
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I hope this video encourages you to see yourself through your Creator’s eyes. Be encouraged!